“If you love children don’t delay, if you love science don’t stop. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.” Ana Pereira
The challenges faced by dual-career academic couples are widespread, with one-third of US faculty having an academic partner (1). Often referred to as the ‘two-body problem’, the major challenge encountered by dual-academic couples is finding a research position in the same location. For dual-career couples who are also parents, the demands of raising a family adds another layer of complexity to an already difficult balancing act. Our October SciMom Chats event explored these issues through the lens of two academic couples, each parenting four children. The panel featured Drs. Lisa and Edwin Ostrin and Drs. Ana and Joao Pereira.
Lisa is a professor at the University of Houston College of Optometry and Edwin is a physician–scientist at the University of Houston MD Anderson Cancer Center. They became parents early in their careers while still in graduate school. Ana is a pharmacist and researcher who paused her career after the birth of their twins. Her husband Joao navigated the challenges of being an international scholar and pursuing an academic position at the University of Alabama at Birmingham.
The conversion was candid and open, delving into the sacrifices, successes, and systemic changes needed to thrive in the academic STEMM environment. A key issue was the saturated job market, which pressures candidates to keep their academic spouse hidden during the hiring process. Joao called for greater transparency and removal of the stigma associated with being labeled a “trailing spouse”.
Networking emerged as an important strategy for both couples. As Lisa and Edwin started their family during graduate school, they were strategic about networking early in their careers, which they believe was instrumental to their success. They brainstormed options that would be “meaningful and satisfying to their careers”. Lisa spoke about attending conferences with a newborn in tow. As international scholars, Joao and Ana’s network was more limited, so they took a different approach. This led Joao to speak out on social media about his experience navigating a career in science as a parent.
A common theme among both couples was the immense pressure for scientists to perform at a level that was not viable for parents, especially mothers, since traditionally they carry most of the childcare burden. Academia offers no buffer for the challenges of raising a family. Joao lamented the expectation of productivity to match a person without a family, and mentioned that “the job market still undervalues mothers.” Joao and Ana shared the challenges of taking parental leave, particularly after their twins. Mothers face career penalties with interrupted research projects, while fathers are expected to continue as normal because of cultural pressures to work. Joao remarked, “From the father’s side…what we do [as a father] is not as important, so we’re supposed to just give it up and be at work.”
Lisa also encountered lulls in her career when parenting during Ed’s intense medical training. She touched on the unexpected yet persistent impact of mom guilt and the pressure to do “everything”: research, publishing, kids.
“The mom guilt, even to this day, never goes away… even as the kids are aging into middle and high school. And now in college, it’s never going to end.”
Ed echoed the disproportionate burden placed on Lisa during his medical training, admitting: “I don’t pretend like I was an equal contributor… There’s really no model for having babies during medical training.” Ana faced additional challenges as an international scholar, including complicated spousal visas and a lack of extended family and support systems. Joao would have gladly interrupted his career, but the visa restrictions ultimately dictated who stayed at home. Taking a career break, Ana recalled the negative stigma she experienced: “Oh… you’re not working are you? … What are you doing? And why are you not coming back?”
Adding to the complexity of being a parent of young children is finding suitable daycare and managing frequent sick days while navigating the current academic system, which is based on an unrealistic model that successful scientists need to chase papers and grants at the expense of their personal lives. “Having children is a part of natural human existence. And we act like it's this exceptional thing that people have to go through. We as a species wouldn't be here if people didn't have children”, Ed mentioned.
“This idea that especially women will never be as competitive… is a deeply flawed idea. We should all be striving to do better.”
To conclude he added that “the paradigm for the successful scientist or the successful businessman, or the successful…man, is some monomaniacal white guy who is an absentee father, who can spend 100 hours a week doing something, and you will always be compared to that paradigm, we will all fall short if if we decide to be more involved in our children's life.”
The discussion then shifted to strategies and policies for change. Ana advocated for increased parental leave, while Joao emphasized the need for institutions to normalize having children. He noted disparities in policies: “At one university, the breastfeeding room was in the basement, dark and damp.” Addressing these issues is critical to retaining parents. Lisa and Ed argued for systemic change at the national level, as the US system is a particularly challenging ecosystem for parents. For example, there is significant variability between R1 research institutions in their accommodations for academic partners (2). Granting organizations must acknowledge that scientists have commitments outside of science. This includes not only parenting but other worthwhile activities such as community outreach or clinical duties.
The speakers concluded with valuable practical advice: expand your networks, seek support, and explore parent groups and online communities. As the panel discussion wrapped up, the fathers gave touching tributes to their partners for their support and in recognition of the unequal pressures on their careers: “While we are all in this together, the burden often comes down to women, and the unequal burden to Lisa, Ed shared. And Joao candidly recognised that “None of the academic accomplishments would not be there if not for Ana, she has been the backbone”. Final remarks by the mothers leave a ray of hope for future aspiring scientists who wish to start families: “If you love it, keep persevering.”, says Lisa. And Ana added: “If you love children don’t delay, if you love science don’t stop. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.”
References:
1. University, S. (2019). Dual Career Academic Couples: What Universities Need to Know. Going Diverse: Innovative Answers to Future Challenges.
2. Monahan, T., Waltz, M., Erol, M., & Fisher, J.A. 2024. Partner Hire Scorecard: A Ranking of the Partner-friendly Status of U.S. Universities. The Dual-Careers Project. Chapel Hill, NC: The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.
Written by Christina Gutierrez Ford
Edited by Rachel James
Published on 16th April 2025